The Republic of Crystal Beast Emerald Tortoise is a massive, socially progressive nation, remarkable for its irreverence towards religion. The hard-working population of 4.033 billion Crystal Beast Emerald Tortoiseans have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The relatively small government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Education. The average income tax rate is 17.7%.

The Crystal Beast Emerald Tortoisean economy, worth 184 trillion gems a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Woodchip Exports, Information Technology, and Uranium Mining. Average income is 45,762 gems, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.5 times as much as the poorest.

It is illegal to make racist remarks in public, captains must wait until all rats are safe before jumping ship, scientists regularly clone human beings for research purposes, and organ donation rates are among the lowest in the region. Crime is relatively low, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Crystal Beast Emerald Tortoise's national animal is the tortoise, which can occasionally be seen sifting through garbage in the nation's cities.

Crystal Beast Emerald Tortoise is ranked 149,678^th in the world and 2,317^th in Ambition for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring 96.5 on the Clooney Contribution Index.